Blood-Stained Switch
by do you know da wae
Summary: she never meant to do it; it was that bad girl, it was always that other evil girl, right? (contains possibly disturbing content)


**Based off Mayu's song from the Evillious Chronicles, Blood-Stained Switch, which showcases Hereditary Evil Raiser Syndrome. Support the producer, Akuno-P/mothy, he's awesome! Asylum AU; contains a few mentions of other Vocaloids.**

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 _i. there was a switch_

The white-haired girl creeps along the floor. Tonight she can't sleep; just like with so many nights, she tossed and turned, sleepless and afraid of the monsters that lurk in the dark... those beasts that she can't see but whose presence she can feel with every waking breath.

She's afraid; and her father, her beloved father, always comforts her, stroking her hair, telling her, _Don't be scared, sweet. They're not real._

But they are to her. She remembers vividly the day that faceless men in white coats came to her home and her father hissed to her to hide, to run, to stay quiet and hide in the shadows; and she wanted to know why so badly, but the urgency and fear in his eyes was so real and intense that she fled.

And she _saw_... she saw the men swarm through, ask her father, _Where is the girl? Is she sane?_

As her father answered, _No. She's fine, she's not here at the moment,_ her breath had caught in fear, panting in horror, and they'd heard her. One had charged up, and her father had led out a yell of surprise, and that was when she saw the switch.

So utterly tempting, so red and bright like a beacon gesturing to her, her brain whirling and a silky voice hissing, _Press it! Press it!_

And she had resisted, no, she was a good girl and that switch was scary, and she had to stay away from dangerous things, because she could hurt herself, wasn't that right?

But then as someone grabbed her she began to cry and sob and then darkness was everywhere and she could see herself leaning over the button and she screamed _no, no, don't, something bad will happen,_ and the girl looked up and a face exactly like hers stared back at her, eyes shining wickedly... and that girl pressed the switch.

Many people looked for that scary man, but they never found him, and the girl's father never told her what happened to him... yet she always had bad dreams of him screaming under her hands... why?

All she remembered was blood and fear and just that girl laughing at her and when she came to her father told her, _Don't press the switch._

So she did, because she's a good girl! A good girl who loves her father! But that day she saw fear in him and to this day she doesn't know why...

She needs her father; his comfort is always there, and she watches him work, her breath coming in long deep gasps of relief as she basks in the knowledge that her father is _there_ and if she needs him she can run to his arms.

And then she sees it again; that lovely, ugly, vile switch and the girl giggling at her. Then she screams again, _Don't press it, don't press... I'm a good girl! I'm not going to-_

She resists- she looks away from the switch and weeps and cries and rakes her own skin with her nails as the other girl laughs and she collapses to the floor.

 _ii. she pressed it, didn't she?_

Her father turns and then the other girl snickers and she's begging, screaming herself hoarse and that switch is moving and she can see the results and at the same time she's crying out _don't press it, please, I don't want to be alone, stop, stop stop stop it stop it,_ and it hurts so badly she's afraid that her head will implode-

And then the girl cooes at her, _Just press it..._

She sobs, _no, you're a bad girl, I'm a good girl..._

The girl answers mockingly, _You're a bad girl at heart, I know you!_ And the only thing the girl can answer with is, _I can control myself, I'm not you!_ Even though that girl looks exactly like her and she knows that she's looking at herself- but this can't be her, this can't possibly be her with bloodstained hands and a crazed smile stretched over snow-white teeth.

She rocks on the floor weeping, and then white light fills her eyes and she knows nothing but the switch which engulfs her vision and fills her mind with a mad mantra of _don't press it, don't press it, I'm not evil, don't press it..._

Then the next thing she knows her voice howls out into the night with fear as she stares at her father's corpse and a mocking voice fills her head, _you pressed it_.

And eventually the scary men come and take her away and she can do nothing but fight and scream and struggle not to press that switch because it's bad, her father has been reduced to flesh and death because that bad girl, that other her, touched that switch!

 _iii. i promise it wasn't me_

Everything is white and bleached and yet she sees blood; she hugs her knees and trembles as dark eyes look into hers and a steel-cold voice asks, _Did you murder your father?_

At the memory she bursts into tears and screams that no, she didn't, that switch wasn't pressed by her, she didn't even know how it happened, and she begs them for mercy as they gather and whisper, stare at her like she's a senseless, caged animal.

 _Come, little girl. Welcome to your new home._

She doesn't know how this can be home because her home is where her warm, loving father is, not a pure white, sterile place where screams echo down the hallways and oddly familiar mad laughter fills every corner.

Shaking as she is dragged down the halls, she sees things that will haunt her for a long, long time; a green-haired girl chained up in a straitjacket talking to herself, a white-haired girl with blue-violet eyes pinned up to the wall and being electrified over and over again, a yellow-haired boy speaking to a mirror, a blonde woman gripping a bloody knife in her hands, a blue-haired male who clutches his head and rocks in a corner, a teal-haired girl with blank green-blue eyes raking her own skin away from her flesh.

The man dragging her laughs and tells her, _Don't stare, don't you know it's rude? They're just like you, after all. The girl with ten faces; the demon who won't die; a boy who speaks to his reflection; a woman who loved too much; a man who is a shell; and a girl who lives delusions._

And she denies it because it can't be; she's not like them, not at all! If anything it's that bad, bad other her who needs to be here; that bad, bad girl who always presses the switch!

She tells him- _please, sir, don't misunderstand, I didn't press the switch, that other bad girl did!_

And he merely laughs like he knows something she doesn't, and she glares up at him and she really wants to press the switch but she won't! She won't! She's not a bad, naughty girl! She'll make her father proud!

But every time she sees his face she sees the switch, and wants to press it, and she thinks, _maybe he's right..._

 _No! He's not! I'm not evil!_

 _iv. please don't hurt me_

Now her life is empty and deathless and she's reduced to a shell.

Some try to talk to her but she snarls at them and sometimes, just sometimes, she lets that bad girl press the switch because her resolve is dying; those men don't believe that she's a good girl, and she can't convince them.

And her world goes dark as the other her presses the switch and she always wakes in a room, chained up, with the switch flashing at the back of her vision and she just...

Oh, she doesn't know anymore! She's muddled and confused and so miserable here!

What did she ever do to deserve this?

The first time, her cries of fear resound as the cruel men approach with a needle glittering as cold as her bad self's eyes, and it nears her skin. She screams for hours afterward, tearing at her skin to get rid of the terrifying parasitic feel of something crawling under her, something tearing at her brain.

The second time she thrashes in her chair, knowing what's coming, and she begs them, howls at them that she wasn't the bad one, please, and they do it anyway.

The third time her protests are weaker and, afterwards, she limply lies in the corner of her cell and she stares at her fingers and she is wide awake, yet dreams of blood flooding her world.

The fourth time she says softly, _don't hurt me, I hate it,_ and they laugh because they know they've broken her.

She gets used to it after a while, used to the sting of the needle and the sting of their words as they reiterate the ferocity of her bad, naughty self- clawing at walls to get to her prey, hissing and spitting like a wild animal, laughing madly and shrieking, _the switch, the switch!_

That awful injection which she _hates so badly_ is supposed to make her placid and docile, make the switch inaccessible.

But it never works; it doesn't!

And they don't know; so she cries and laughs and red fills her waking hours as she resists the siren's call of the switch which she won't press because she's not evil and that other girl is such a _bad, bad girl_ , and she doesn't know when it happens... but eventually her mind breaks, the rope she's wobbling on snaps, and she falls and her hysterical laughter echoes and all that remains is the blood-stained switch.


End file.
